The house was silent as I turned off the light and walked to the door. Slowly wrenching the door open, I winced as it complained on squeaky hinges, the outer storm door clicking all the way shut from the suction.
I had violated the stillness of night.
I stepped out into the cold and closed the door as quietly as I could, unknowingly holding my breath. Fumbling in the dark, my key finally found its target and I turned the lock, hearing the soft clack of the bolt sliding home. Gazing upward, I breathed in the solitude of the stars. I walked out to the driveway, looking upward as I did so. Listening. There was no sound in the world but my own breathing. I stopped before I left the smooth concrete slab that masked the sound of my footsteps. Again looking upward, I let myself float away.
It felt as if the stars were displaying themselves to me--only me. In all the world there was no one else scanning the heavens at that moment. I was the solitary man facing the infinity of the universe. In an apparent greeting, they winked softly at me as I gazed. I relaxed my eyes, almost letting them close, as I took a slow, deep breath of the cold night. I tasted the quiet sweetness of the air as it passed into my body, feeling a slight vertigo as my mind thanked me. I breathed outward, at once both exhaling and emitting a sigh of resignation. I knew I must continue. I stepped off the concrete, resuming the short walk to my car.
Then again I violated the stillness of the night.
My footsteps on the gravel echoed loudly, threatening to wake the sleeping. They were amplified in the still morning, and I apologized silently to the world for daring to disturb the emptiness. I sighed with relief as my footsteps were once again silent when they reached the firmness of the asphalt road. As carefully as I could, I put my key into the door and unlocked the car. Opening the door, I slid onto the seat and started the car. Oddly, I felt no qualms about starting the car--perhaps because I felt safe there, sitting within its confines. The night was cold, however, and I opened the door with my ice scraper in hand, wielding it with heaviness, with the feeling I was on my way to commit a crime. Standing next to my car, I looked up at the stars. They seemed to be watching me, waiting for me to do what they knew I had to do. I looked down and I placed the scraper against the icy smoothness of the windshield and pushed.
Once more I violated the stillness of the night.
The car was already running, humming quietly, but even so the scream that was released by the complaining scraper made me close my eyes and pause momentarily. I winced, expecting every porch light on every house to snap on, their doors to open, and dogs their dogs to start barking. When that thankfully didn't happen, I resumed my task, almost feeling like I was breaking the law and finding myself in a hurry to get it finished and get out of there. I drove away, breathing a sigh of relief.
Behind me, the night was still once again.
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